Today I ate a burger with fries, and a snickers ice cream bar. I think I'd consider this a binge, yet it's still less than I would've eaten for a typical meal before I started the blog.
If you live in the southwest USA, then you probably know In-N-Out makes the best burgers and fries in the world. I've had $50 burgers made with Kobe beef and they weren't as good. I don't think there's anything a chef could do to make a burger better than an In-N-Out burger.
I tried to induce vomiting, but was unsuccessful.
All totaled, I ate less than 1400 calories today, since I only ate the one meal. It's significantly less than my basal metabolic rate, so I guess I should call that a success.
I just realized that I could lose 100lbs and still have a binge disorder.
I'm seeing a psychologist, seeking the support of others, and trying to lose weight. I guess there's not much else to do but keep on trying to change. I just don't know how (or if) I'm ever going to make a binge no longer appeal to me.
There's something great about fasting. When I'm fasting I'm always carrying with me the anticipation of a future event that I'll enjoy. I know someday I'll eat again, it doesn't really matter when, and I know that when I do, it's going to be great. Not only is it going to be great, but it's going to taste even better with every extra hour I starve.
You could compare it to climbing up Everest. It can't feel very good when you're in your tenth straight hour of climbing, icicles hanging from your nose and dizzy from the thinning atmosphere, but at the same time it must feel good to endure all that abuse knowing eventually you'll be standing up on that summit, trying to echo your cheers off the next mountain over.
Another pound of not-very-meaningful statistical variance.
I've decided I'm gonna take updated progress photos every 20lbs, so when I hit 266 we'll all get to see what 286 - 20 looks like. I'm guessing it'll probably happen before The New Year.